Having Fun Being Good

Do you enjoy going to a grocery store alone (yeah, rare moment) and hear a child in the next aisle screaming they want something or a parent screaming (don't get me started on that topic) at their child for misbehaving or having a can of corn flung at you as you walk down that same aisle never suspecting a temper tantrum is in progress? That is just not cool for anyone to have to deal with, but we all see it in the stores. No one really wants to be that parent in the aisle with the child who is just not understanding not now or we have to buy these groceries but we can't buy everything in the store. And no one wants to have to listen to those children not understand. *I am using a grocery store as an example rather than get into the whole ban children from restaurants rant.*
So we, as parents, are responsible to discipline our children so that we never have to deal with that situation, but that word is almost as bad as a four letter word in most households. You don't want to be the bad guy. You don't want to play good cop/bad cop. You just don't want to deal with it for the most part, but you have to!! We all do.
Discipline is defined as training to act in accordance with rules. But we have to make things fun for our children because a 3 year old does not understand that the grocery store is not a place to remove all of his clothing and a 5 year old does not understand that the chocolate bars are not there for her to open and eat right there in the store. My version of discipline is a bit of avoidance. I want to avoid the situation so that I, quite honestly, do not have to deal with it! Lazy? Maybe, but hear me out and see if you support it.
Let's move away from the store to a park. Fun place for a child, but have you had a little one have that meltdown before leaving? We all have, don't say you didn't cause you are just telling a fib! ;-) So, what I do to avoid that is a few things..
First of all, some people enjoy impromptu visits to the park, but I find them miserable. Go in with a plan and have a "park kit" in your vehicle if you choose to do this.
Bring your water. Always have water for your children (a bottle for each to prevent a fight) so that they can keep hydrated no matter what the weather. You can keep bottles in your car, but I always recommend bringing water along whenever we go somewhere cause it's Murphy's Law for me ;-)
When you get to the park, take a moment and make eye contact. Establish rules and guidelines that must be followed when you are at the park. I get out of my van and stand at the side door to do that. Rules can include things such as, we need to be kind to our friends while we are at the park and do not eat mulch. I also include things such as do not walk in front of the swings unless you want to end up on the ground. And I am also known to tell them if they behave like fools and ignore that last rule, they will get hurt and (as is frequently quoted in our home) "I'm not taking you to the emergency room." We also include the rules for leaving....
We are leaving the park at 11:15 this morning. It is (get out your phone) now 10. That is an hour and 15 minutes from now. I have set an alarm to give you your 5 minute warning. No one is allowed to whine when the warning is issued. Nor is there any whining allowed when it is time to leave. And the best rule is Have fun! ;-)
You say, good rules Kim but do they work. For the most part, yes, but you have to be willing to stop talking to the other Mom's and push on the swing. You also have to be willing to climb when you don't want to and slide when you are wondering if the slide will really hold all that weight! And you have to be willing to enforce the rules. I give my children their 5 minute warning and another one at three and two. At one minute, I tell them it is time to tell their friends goodbye and to start moving towards our van. For the most part, the trips are successful with few boo boos and hopefully without meltdowns. 
Have my children ended up in timeout because of behavior? Yup. Have my children ended up on their butts from walking in front of a swing? Yup ;-) But if you come in with structure, you get structure. If you come in with nothing, you get nothing.
Come up with a plan, no matter where you are going. Moms should all have crayons and paper in their purse as well as a pen and pencil. Small toys should be in there and a snack should ALWAYS be part of your trip.
Discipline can be fun and easy. You just have to have a plan and stick to it. I wish you all well trying to keep peace :-)