I Saw Him

I saw God today and what a glorious sight it was. I started to go to bed already and as I finished my bath and prepared to lay down, my heart said, not yet. I felt Him speaking to me to come type this blog entry.
Tonight, as I entered the dance studio, I heard bits and pieces of a story that sent chills down my spine. He was right there. In the eyes of a mother. on the tired face of a little girl. Right in front of me!!! And as realization sets in now, I am amazed. I witnessed a Faith like none other. A Faith that can only show God.

Let me explain... It was a quiet night in the studio. I had taken Owen for his make up tap class and saw his teacher, Ms. Tracy speaking with a mother. As I put on Owen's shoes and prepared him for class, I only half listened to the conversation. It's a small room, you see, so a private conversation is not something that could happen. I saw this woman that looked no different than you nor I and heard something that struck me. "It's February, and I'm still here." I heard her talk about finding a doctor that she really trusts that will help the cancer go away. I heard her positive attitude and determination to beat this disease that has built a home inside her and I thought, wow! What an incredible woman (as I often do with cancer). Then I felt my heart tug as I heard her talk about her daughter who I had seen inside the studio dancing her little heart out. I don't know the family. I didn't recognize either of them, but Ms. Tracy had mentioned it was good that they were back. I then heard the mother talk about how her daughter had just finished a round of radiation for the cancer in her knee but that she was eager to be back at dancing. I didn't even get it then. As this little girl came out, just slightly out of breath with a beautiful smile on her face. Ms. Tracy said, I love the new hair too. The mother looked at her daughter with a look of sadness and said, "That's all that has returned." That's when it hit me. This little girl. This beautiful tiny dancer had been going through cancer as well. The battle raging in their home was on both mother and daughter and their struggle was together. I couldn't fathom. There were no words for these strangers...for this struggle with the devil to heal their broken bodies.

There are some who say, "God won't put anymore on your shoulders than you can carry." I have heard it many times in my life. The idea that God puts something on us and knows our limits and takes us to our breaking point to see how strong we are is not so. At least I don't think it is. God doesn't put things on us or send enormous tragedies that destroy us and fragment our lives. That's not the God I know.

Read the gospels. Listen about Jesus and see what God is like. Jesus doesn't pull triggers or walk down the street and wreck cars or send diseases to people, or cause heart attacks. God doesn't take a father or daughter from a family because God is lonely and needs them in heaven. Jesus heals and feed and opens eyes and befriends and loves! In our world, cars crash and diseases destroy and people act a fool. Why blame God for that!
Paul writes in Romans 8 that in times of suffering and struggle are not times when God is absent, but are times when God is most present with love and solidarity. God stands with us even in the worst of times and nothing, NOTHING, can separate us from God.
When forces larger than life swirl around us and seem beyond our control and overwhelm us, Paul says, "In all of this we are more than conquerors through the one who loves us." That sounds like a promise of victory to me. The cross and resurrection of Jesus show us God's conquest of suffering and death with life. Parade all of the forces that threaten to undo us and destroy us, and pull off their masks and you will see the fraud for what they really are! They cannot separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus. Their power is temporary. God is with us in our suffering, and we share with Christ in God's victory.
How is this belief possible? Look around. See the family battling cancer, the death of a loved one, an inexplicable accident. The Faith in the lives of God's people!
Skeptics call them foolish. Paul calls them victors, conquerors even. What do you call them?